Tuesday, December 31, 2013

some funny---jokes---

“You have four cavities!” barked the naval dentist, looking at the X-rays. He grabbed a huge steel syringe and shot both sides of my mouth full of novocaine. He then looked at the X-rays and then my mouth. Then back at the X-rays and again at my mouth. He then sat down.“I have good news and bad news,” he said. “The bad news is, these are not your X-rays. The good news is, you’re cured.” 


I wear glasses because I like to dramatically remove them to display anger. It was awkward doing that with contact lenses.  http://contactofindia.com/counter.php?rid=AF0001262

A married couple has been out   shopping for hours when the wife realizes that her husband has disappeared. So she calls his 
cellphone. 
“Where are you!?” she yells.
“Darling,” he says, “do you remember that jewellery shop, the one where you saw that diamond necklace you loved? But I didn’t have enough money at the time, so I said, ‘Baby, it’ll be yours one day’?”
“Yes!” she shouts, excitedly.
“Well, I’m in the bar next to it.”  http://mGinger.com/index.jsp?inviteId=9028558957 

I came down with the flu and wanted my husband to do some of the housecleaning. I wasn’t sure how to tell him, so I tried reverse psychology.
“Honey, I’m sorry I’m leaving you with such a mess,” I said between sniffles. “The laundry needs to be done, the dishes washed, the floors cleaned.”
“Don’t you worry,” he said sympathetically. “It can all wait until you feel up to it.” -http://q.gs/1QYxS 

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